heavy

During service last Sunday, I was tearing up a lot. In my head ran through all the plights of cats and dogs I know that are suffering/have suffered. Last week I found out my SG yoga instructor's dog passed away due to cancer. Skylar, a cat in Jo's cattery has a growth in his head that's pushing against one eye, and it's getting worse. Her latest post says blood spurts everywhere when he sneezes. Nigel, the neighbour's outdoor cat is at our door 3 to 5 times a day. He wants affection, food, to make friends with our furries, I dont know. I know he's out there, in the heat, in the cold, no real home, no real love. And I dont know how to walk up to my neighbour and tell them to love their cat more. Love is different to everybody.

It wasnt easy to bring furries over to Oz. Not easy at all. So many risks. So much money. So much to fear. I still shudder when I thought about the whole process of exporting them over, the last moment I saw them in SG, the despair when I learned about Ginger falling ill, the unsettling worry and fear right till we reached quarantine facility and hospital.. It was so much drama and trauma. I would not ever wanna go through that again.
I hug my furballs everyday, thinking of what they've gone through. I love them with my everything. I learn so much from them, every single day. How it's okay to not be the same as others. How it's okay to have imperfections. How it's okay to be alone sometimes. How it's okay to show love and affection. How it's okay when things dont go your way. 

It's okay. Life goes on.

Not a day goes by that I dont think about them leaving me. It's always on my mind. Things come and go. One moment, you're so caught up with a trend, a food, an obsession, a person. Next moment you wonder how those years went by when you were so infatuated with that. I dont wanna miss my furries' beautiful faces. Their innocent love, their individual character. Their body warmth, their headbutts, their unique purrs.

Some people refuse to think/talk about death. Avoid it like the plague. Deal with it when it comes. I've seen enough deaths over the last few years to know that running away from the topic brings more pain. I still cry buckets when I think about my furries leaving me. I just try to cherish them more now. Give them all the attention they need and want.

Okay, done with furry banter. Where am I going with this?
Keep your loved ones close, they're irreplaceable.